Stopping Time At Grand Central Station
For the back story, go here.
Tuesday, February 26, 2008
I Have A Confession To Make
On Sunday night I watched the Oscars just so I could write down all the movies I missed in the theatres during 2007 and still want to see; Because I could then add them to my Netflix queue.
Thursday, February 21, 2008
The Millness
It looks as though I am recovering, albeit sloooowly recovering from the millness. Millness = mystery + illness for any uninformed readers. This word is yet another word made up by yours truly. One of my karolineisms. Use it, enjoy it.
I'll be back to regular postings next week.
I'll be back to regular postings next week.
Tuesday, February 19, 2008
You TOTALLY Want To Know
Since the post about my detox of sorts, I know you have been plagued with thoughts regarding what exactly is in the Green Lemonade concoction. Well, I'll tell you.
Ingredients are as follows: Kale, Celery, Apples, Lemons, Ginger Root (optional). It's even more delicious than it sounds. The way to my heart is through this delicious libation. No, not really, but I figure if I keep telling myself this, then maybe, just maybe, I'll convince myself that this beverage is truly delicious.
I'm drinking it out of a wine glass because it makes me feel regal. Just like my cat.
Green Lemonade is my Very Fancy Feast.
Ingredients are as follows: Kale, Celery, Apples, Lemons, Ginger Root (optional). It's even more delicious than it sounds. The way to my heart is through this delicious libation. No, not really, but I figure if I keep telling myself this, then maybe, just maybe, I'll convince myself that this beverage is truly delicious.
I'm drinking it out of a wine glass because it makes me feel regal. Just like my cat.
Green Lemonade is my Very Fancy Feast.
Friday, February 15, 2008
Detox
I'm doing a 3-5 day green lemonade and water fast beginning Tuesday. I decided to do this seeing as how my energy levels have been all over the map and I'd like to help myself get those in check before heading down to South America at mystery dates still needing to be declared.
Have I ever mentioned how much I hate not knowing solid dates of impending long trips/longer-ranging plans? Well, I do. I hatehatehate it. Being stuck in a state of flux. Trying to figure out where exactly I put my favorite linen pants and sundresses that I may or may not need depending on the dates of the trip. Not being able to commit to any other plans as the waiting continues for a trip with no dates declared yet. I'm so angstified about it that my OCD picking tendencies have reared their ugly head. I've had these in check for awhile, but not so much now. Argh!
Well at least I know where my passport is.
Back to the detox. While I've been eating more normally over the past few weeks and I've been cooking versus eating out as often, I've noticed some not so wonderful physical changes to my body. Of course these changes could be imagined and purely symptomatic of my eating disorder, or they could be reality. I am not sure I want to know, but I did decide to do a modified raw fast next week. I went raw a few years ago, and while it absolutely sucked the first two days, I noticed a significant positive change in my physical health. But maybe it was too good...and raw wasn't to be a long-term diet change for me - especially with my ED history. So it was tried for awhile and then I reverted to more normalized eating. I mean, who REALLY sits down and eats 1/2 a watermelon for lunch? Really.
I am convinced it is going to help me get a lot of crap (no pun intended) out of my body and hopefully help regulate my sleeping schedule a little better. I am also hoping it will help me to slow down a little and stop the OCD behviors I am currently experiencing. I'm sure the fast will be interesting regardless.
Have I ever mentioned how much I hate not knowing solid dates of impending long trips/longer-ranging plans? Well, I do. I hatehatehate it. Being stuck in a state of flux. Trying to figure out where exactly I put my favorite linen pants and sundresses that I may or may not need depending on the dates of the trip. Not being able to commit to any other plans as the waiting continues for a trip with no dates declared yet. I'm so angstified about it that my OCD picking tendencies have reared their ugly head. I've had these in check for awhile, but not so much now. Argh!
Well at least I know where my passport is.
Back to the detox. While I've been eating more normally over the past few weeks and I've been cooking versus eating out as often, I've noticed some not so wonderful physical changes to my body. Of course these changes could be imagined and purely symptomatic of my eating disorder, or they could be reality. I am not sure I want to know, but I did decide to do a modified raw fast next week. I went raw a few years ago, and while it absolutely sucked the first two days, I noticed a significant positive change in my physical health. But maybe it was too good...and raw wasn't to be a long-term diet change for me - especially with my ED history. So it was tried for awhile and then I reverted to more normalized eating. I mean, who REALLY sits down and eats 1/2 a watermelon for lunch? Really.
I am convinced it is going to help me get a lot of crap (no pun intended) out of my body and hopefully help regulate my sleeping schedule a little better. I am also hoping it will help me to slow down a little and stop the OCD behviors I am currently experiencing. I'm sure the fast will be interesting regardless.
Thursday, February 14, 2008
Mantra
I will successfully grow my hair out past this helmethead 'do, I will successfully grow my hair out past this helmethead 'do, I will successfully grow my hair out past this helmethead 'do.
Shampoo.
Rinse.
Rewash.
Rinse.
Rewash.
Rinse.
Condition.
Rinse.
Repeat.
Shampoo.
Rinse.
Rewash.
Rinse.
Rewash.
Rinse.
Condition.
Rinse.
Repeat.
Friday, February 8, 2008
Feel The Power
Tower of Power is coming to the ClevelandOH House of Blues on April 3. I am so there. You know, if I am in the country.
If you haven't heard of this amazing funk and soul band, take an auditory and visual gander: What is Hip?
They are an unbelievable group of musicians. Seriously. Check them out if you can.
If you haven't heard of this amazing funk and soul band, take an auditory and visual gander: What is Hip?
They are an unbelievable group of musicians. Seriously. Check them out if you can.
Zombie Cycle
For the past three months or so I've been having this recurring dream where zombies are traipsing through my backyard. Maybe traipse isn't the best word to describe it, but the zombies are moving in that aimless stumble that is so well depicted in Night of the Living Dead. The zombies aren't doing anything awful like trying to eat my brains or anything, they're just stumbling around walking into trees and just more or less looking like stupefied idiots.
In every dream, I see them while I am looking out the window in my bathroom. And I just stare. I don't move, I don't scream, just stare. I inflict the Gaze on these zombies and nothing else. So after having yet another dream of the zombies last night, I am really beginning to wonder why I keep dreaming of them. Seriously, I wish they would just go away.
In every dream, I see them while I am looking out the window in my bathroom. And I just stare. I don't move, I don't scream, just stare. I inflict the Gaze on these zombies and nothing else. So after having yet another dream of the zombies last night, I am really beginning to wonder why I keep dreaming of them. Seriously, I wish they would just go away.
Thursday, February 7, 2008
First Encounter
My friend Adam recently sent me this: half fart and half yellow horse piss
Prior to this I had not encountered the poetics of Al Purdy, which is kind of interesting and humorous to me seeing as how I've had that multi-year-not-so-secret-secret-love affair with the works of Charles Bukowski. Interesting, indeed.
Prior to this I had not encountered the poetics of Al Purdy, which is kind of interesting and humorous to me seeing as how I've had that multi-year-not-so-secret-secret-love affair with the works of Charles Bukowski. Interesting, indeed.
On another note, Adam also sent me this:
Sagittarius: Have you been thinging about making a change in your life? Well stop thinking and start doing! Regardless of whether it's a major or a minor change you have in mind, make it fast! Gradual transitions are not going to cut it now, because they give you way too much time to change your mind. Use your energy to its maximum effect and get things going in the right direction as quickly as you can. That way you will start to see the rewards of these changes faster, too.
I don't usually put much stock in the astrological aspects of life, but this one particularly rang true to some things I am going through right now. Astrology is all about the interpretation, so I guess I decided to correlate it closely to my life today. Thend.
Wednesday, February 6, 2008
Similarities: Race & Derby Training
As I am still doing my best to stick to my goals and properly train (versus overtraining...which is my typical modus operandi...) for the half-marathon in May, and while I am cursing the powers that be for the lame-o aches and pains I am currently experiencing, I decided I would put together a short list of the similarities twixt race and derby training. I'm sure I forgot some, so if you have suggestions, let me know! Read on!
Some Similarities I Have Drawn Between Race Training And Roller Derby Training:
1. Muscles you never knew you had before suddenly (or slowly, over time) start to hurt.
2. An eight minute mile is simply not good enough. A nine minute mile will never be good enough. At least not in your head.
3. You are definitely still one sweaty beast.
4. Tights, knee socks, and short shorts ALWAYS make for warmer legs.
5. One can never have enough muscle rub. Rub those shin splints out of your head. Ben-Gay might be smelly, but it feels sooo good.
6. Proper stance equates to more efficient and effective use of your body to achieve its ultimate goal.
7. It is unwise to keep makeup on while working out. It stings when it runs into your eyes. After all, you are still one sweaty beast.
8. While training with others, you are still expected to be training on your own.
9. Having the right footwear almost guarantees less injuries.
10. PowerGels are important to access stores of energy you didn't know you had. Simple sugars work wonders.
11. Proper use of an Ace bandage might mean the difference between saving or losing that one jelly ankle you have…you know the one I'm talking about. Yeah, that one.
12. You thought you had knee problems before training, ha! Just look at you now.
13. A banana and a cup of oatmeal are the BEST pre-long-training-session foods.
14. Excellent tuneage still makes you push yourself harder.
15. Never underestimate the power of the bandana.
16. The fans and supporters are still OOC on game/race day.
17. Oh sure, that ciggie tastes and feels awesomely delicious right now, but you will undoubtedly regret it within the first ten minutes of your workout.
18. Sidewalks are dangerous at night.
Some Similarities I Have Drawn Between Race Training And Roller Derby Training:
1. Muscles you never knew you had before suddenly (or slowly, over time) start to hurt.
2. An eight minute mile is simply not good enough. A nine minute mile will never be good enough. At least not in your head.
3. You are definitely still one sweaty beast.
4. Tights, knee socks, and short shorts ALWAYS make for warmer legs.
5. One can never have enough muscle rub. Rub those shin splints out of your head. Ben-Gay might be smelly, but it feels sooo good.
6. Proper stance equates to more efficient and effective use of your body to achieve its ultimate goal.
7. It is unwise to keep makeup on while working out. It stings when it runs into your eyes. After all, you are still one sweaty beast.
8. While training with others, you are still expected to be training on your own.
9. Having the right footwear almost guarantees less injuries.
10. PowerGels are important to access stores of energy you didn't know you had. Simple sugars work wonders.
11. Proper use of an Ace bandage might mean the difference between saving or losing that one jelly ankle you have…you know the one I'm talking about. Yeah, that one.
12. You thought you had knee problems before training, ha! Just look at you now.
13. A banana and a cup of oatmeal are the BEST pre-long-training-session foods.
14. Excellent tuneage still makes you push yourself harder.
15. Never underestimate the power of the bandana.
16. The fans and supporters are still OOC on game/race day.
17. Oh sure, that ciggie tastes and feels awesomely delicious right now, but you will undoubtedly regret it within the first ten minutes of your workout.
18. Sidewalks are dangerous at night.
Monday, February 4, 2008
Super Skinny Me
While most people were watching the Super Bowl yesterday, I was watching this: Super Skinny Me
Thank you for making this short documentary, BBC. Thank you.
It's a pretty insightful piece. Especially considering that the two journalists involved were of "sound mind" when they opted to participate in the experiment.
Overall, I found it bittersweet and think it is a pretty enlightening piece for the general public/audiences.
Many people I know and talk with regularly think this ED stuff primarily happens to younger women - adolescents in their teenage years.
And they find it to be a hard pill to swallow when they learn that women my age struggle with ED - or that it never went away from previous years of abuse.
And harder still to swallow when people discover women older than myself struggle with it.
The ignorance makes me want to scream sometimes.
Thank you for making this short documentary, BBC. Thank you.
It's a pretty insightful piece. Especially considering that the two journalists involved were of "sound mind" when they opted to participate in the experiment.
Overall, I found it bittersweet and think it is a pretty enlightening piece for the general public/audiences.
Many people I know and talk with regularly think this ED stuff primarily happens to younger women - adolescents in their teenage years.
And they find it to be a hard pill to swallow when they learn that women my age struggle with ED - or that it never went away from previous years of abuse.
And harder still to swallow when people discover women older than myself struggle with it.
The ignorance makes me want to scream sometimes.
Friday, February 1, 2008
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