Tuesday, November 13, 2007

Getting out of bed today was a bad choice.

Today I was going to write the second installment of my timeline and I am not feeling inspired, so I probably should not. I am the epitome of cranknasty right now. I can't seem to stop the bum rush either. The cranks just won't go away no matter how much I meditate, will it, try to think positively, etc. Sooooo, I'll see where the rest of the day takes me.

Brief snapshot of my day thus far: It started off badly with me rolling out of bed at 752AM when I had a 900AM interview. In Maryville. A forty minute drive from my apartment if there is no traffic. Forty. Minute. Drive. And no traffic?! Ha! NIIICE, right? No.

Then my hair wouldn't do anything short of a Spock-esque 'do. Yes, from Star Trek. No, I have not yet taken a picture, but will try to do so before the product loses its hold. Haha. This is also nice, right? No.

I get to the interview on-time, even seven or eight minutes early...thank you MINI. But I am cranky without appropriate caffeine consumption and bomb out when responding to the questions asked of me. I just know it. My answers to the questions were horrible. Horrible. Had I woken up on-time and consumed at least two 20 ounce bottles of Diet Coke, I would have been ok. But no. I didn't even have 10 ounces of Diet Coke. Anyways, you know how you just know things sometimes, I just know it. And knew it. Even if the hiring manager liked me, the VP of HR certainly didn't as he called me by a different name as I was leaving. Triple NIIIIICE, right? No.

I leave the interview, get in my car. Only to find the service engine light ignited yet again on the domey thing above my steering wheel. This is just what a recently full-time unemployed chica known as me needs right now. Sure, I have freelance, but bill cycle and payout times aren't always consistent. AWESOME. No.

Then I get home. Something smells unsavory in my apartment. What do I do? Start taking stuff out of my derby bag only to find a rotten banana in one of the "secret" pockets in my bag. It has got to be at least two weeks old because I only put food in my bag on bout dates. October 27 was our last bout. And why did I not smell it whilst up north? Because the temperature ranges from coldest to coldestest up there. So the hey nanner nanner must have frozen in my car. Frozen = No Smell. Gross. Yes. AWESOME. No.

I then get so frustrated about the banana and the interview that I decide I should go to the library to be more productive in my job search. Need to get the hell out of my apartment, you know? So I pack up my laptop bag, grab a hat and sweatshirt. I go outside and it is freaking monsooning. I decide to forge ahead. Yeah. The freeways are flooded and everyone is driving horribly and I swear I hydroplaned a few times. I swear. I thought I was going to die. FANTASTIC. No.

Arrive at the library only to find that I forgot my power c(h)ord at home. Yes, it is symphonic. Anyway...I thought I packed it. I thought about turning around and going back out to get it, but then thought I didn't want to die today, so I stayed. EXCELLENT. No.

And now I am here writing this blog with 35% of my battery power left and there are too many high school kids milling around having social hour and being all upspeaky and teenagery. And I want to spit poisonous darts at them just to get them to shut up already...didn't they learn the library is for quiet time? Go to a private room or go somewhere else if you are going to talk so LOUDLY.

And then on top of it all, there is this kid sitting right behind me who breathes really heavily. Like he has a deviated septum on crack. And if you know me well, you know that I think the heavy breathing quality is one of the most abhorred afflictions I think someone could possess. I want to spit darts at all heavy breathers, too. Especially this one. OMG.

Thus far, today is something I could conceive as being a hell. My hell. Today. Right now. It better get better. Or else. Something. But I don't quite know what that something is.

Funny, I haven't asked for patience lately, but it seems I am getting hella tested.

What is up with that?

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